The Weird and Wonderful Intersection Between Writing and Knitting

November 9, 2024Journal, Reviews, KnittingE.S.O. Martin

You might be wondering how knitting and writing are related, but they have a lot of similarities. They both require a tremendous amount of skill, patience, and consistency. Like a sweater, a novel is a project that takes many days of consistent effort to complete. Both are built in tiny increments — word by word, stitch by stitch. Sometimes you have to unravel a section and start over. Both require craft, creativity, and patience.

While it’s hard to get a firm number on how many people in the world knit, Forbes magazine estimates that approximately 45 million Americans know how to knit, so it seems inevitable that there would be some overlap between knitters and writers.

I had no idea how pervasive that overlap was, though, until I came across two essay collections edited by Ann Hood (who has herself written a novel about knitting). The two collections are Knitting Yarns and Knitting Pearls, and they feature such literary giants as Barbara Kingsolver, Elizabeth Berg, Jodi Picoult, Ann Patchett, Sue Grafton, Diana Gabaldon, Dani Shapiro, Andre Dubus III, Bill Roorback, and Steve Almond.

Until recently, I never really thought of knitting as something special, or that it would be a worthy writing topic. I learned to knit when I was ten years old, and it was a hobby my mother and I always shared. Sometimes it can be hard to recognize something special about your family until you see it through the eyes of another.

For the past few months, I have been going on a deep-dive on fiction and narrative non-fiction stories about knitting. It has been absolutely fascinating to learn about how knitting has impacted the lives of other writers, and in the role knitting sometimes plays in their creative process.

The more I looked, the more stories I found about writer-knitters. I think Tara Ison does a good job describing what knitting gives her as a writer:

“My professional life as a writer is a life of the mind. But knitting is a bodily, sensual, tactile experience. Knitting offers an escape from the writer’s mind […] Even if I’m thinking about my work while I knit, it’s almost as if the yarn […] absorbs the interior white noise, which frees me up to focus.”

She goes on to say that she uses knitting breaks the way another writer might use a cigarette break. Or a drinking break. Knitting is certainly healthier!

“Sometimes I put in 12-hour days [writing]. Numerous times throughout the day, I’ll literally have a sudden need to go to the couch and knit for half an hour. Like someone else might take a cigarette break. When I feel my body physically choking up, and I need to get out of my chair. Or when I hit a place in the work where things are snarled, then I need to work with something that isn’t snarled. Working with my hands […] I don’t consciously try to think of ways to undo writing knots. But after about 20 minutes of knitting, I’m able to go back to the work. I then find that my consciousness has done a lot of the work for me.” — p. 130-131, Tara Ison, screenwriter and author of A Child Out of Alcatraz. This quote is from an interview in the book Zen and the Art of Knitting by Burnadette Murphy

How knitting affects my work as a writer:

For a while, I gave up knitting because it was too easy—whereas writing was hard. I would knit daydream about the stories I wanted to write someday, but the act of knitting took time away from producing those stories. I only have two hands. The hours in the day are limited. Knitting got pushed to the back of the closet.

Additionally, I have to be aware of my hands. When I write or knit too much, my wrists become inflamed. Wrist tendonitis. Strength training has certainly improved my stamina and eased my discomfort somewhat, but I still have to respect my body’s limits. For writing, I can use dictation to protect my wrists and save them for when I have to edit, handwrite, or when typing isn’t avoidable. I have a split ergonomic keyboard, and I try to write at a stand-up desk whenever I can.

For knitting, I need to pay attention to my body and know when to stop. I’ve also noticed that using needles or material that is too small is rough on my hands, which why I’m reluctant to knit socks because they require the tiniest of yarns and needles. I feel most comfortable using needles between size 3 and 9.

Now that I have written and published a couple of books and my son is a little older, I feel like I am not as rushed. I’ve brought knitting back into my life because it brings me so much joy.

I love the idea of using knitting as a smoke-free way to take a break and look out the window… so long as I put the knitting down and go back to my writing desk.

I’m a very wiggly person and sometimes the hardest part of writing is just sitting down. Without knitting keeping me put, I’m most likely to get up and pace around the house looking for something to clean.

Most often, though, I find myself knitting during times when writing doesn’t make sense, like when I want to be physically and emotionally present for my friends and family. It feels wonderful to snuggle next to my family on the couch with a knitting project in my lap. Or to look out the window, as a passenger on a long car ride, with a puddle of lace slowly gathering shape in my lap.

It has been interesting to notice how knitting, sewing, weaving, and embroidery have started to appear in my stories. Right now I’m working on a story where one of the characters is able to make magical garments through knitting certain patterns into her work. It is really fun to write about a craft I already have a deep knowledge of.

Books About the Knitting Life

While it is possible to knit and read at the same time with the help of a book stand, I think that audiobooks and knitting are the perfect companions. The books listed below aren’t pattern books—although some of them do contain patterns. These books are narrative stories by, for, and about people who love knitting.

Collected Essays and Memoir:

Knitting Yarns: Writers on Knitting, edited by Ann Hood — Fabulous essays by incredible authors about their experiences knitting. Authors such as Barbara Kingsolver.

Knitting Pearls: Writers on Knitting, edited by Ann Hood — More essays by authors who knit or who have stories about knitting.

A Life in Stitches: Knitting My Way Through Love, Loss, and Laughter, by Rachael Herron — Twenty essays on the knitting life by Rachel Herron, who is a romance author and 911 dispatcher.

The Girl in the Green Sweater: A Life in Holocaust’s Shadow by Krystyna Chiger and Daniel Paisner — A memoir about Krystyna Chiger’s experience as a child in Lviv, Poland (now part of Ukraine). Chiger and her family were forced into the sewers of the city to escape the Nazis. One of Chiger’s prize possessions was the green sweater her grandmother had knitted her, and which she managed to preserve despite her time in the sewer. The green sweater is now on display at the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum and has been recreated by knitters around the world. Knitters can find a pattern for the green sweater on Ravelry.

Unraveling: What I Learned About Life While Shearing Sheep, Dyeing Wool, and Making the World’s Ugliest Sweater by Peggy Orenstein — Set during the COVID pandemic, lifelong knitter Peggy Orenstein seeks to help herself cope by knitting a sweater from the ground up. She learns to sheer sheep, spin wool, and dye yarn.

The Yarn Whisperer: My Unexpected Life in Knitting by Clara Parkes — Humorous essays by the knitting author and teacher on a life spent knitting and around knitters.

Knitlandia: A Knitter Sees the World by Clara Parkes — More essays by Clara Parks about her adventures traveling the world as the author of a knitting and yarn industry. She visits textile expos and travels to knitting retreats, and contemplates how the knitting world has grown and changed over her many years as a knitter.

Knitting Craft and Spirituality

Knitting Sutra: Craft as a Spiritual Practice by Susan Gordon Lyndon — Susan Gordon Lyndon explores the idea of knitting as a form of prayer, meditation, and a life spent doing crafts as a manifestation of someone’s spiritual path.

Knitting Heaven and Earth: Healing the Heart with Craft, by Susan Gordon Lyndon — In this follow-up to the Knitting Sutra, Susan Gordon Lyndon explores how the physical and mindful practice of doing crafts can help a person through heartache, grief, and illness.

Zen and the Art of Knitting: Exploring the Links Between Knitting, Spirituality, and Creativity by Burnadette Murphy — This book explores the spiritual and mindful aspects of knitting, and how it can be a fulfilling form of meditation.

The Mindfulness in Knitting: Meditations on Craft and Calm by Rachael Matthews — This book contains thoughts and mindfulness meditations to deepen the spiritual experience of the craft.

Novels About Knitters and Knitting

Knitting: A Novel by Anne Bartlett — Sandra and Martha are two women who seem to be opposites, but they are both suffering from large stores of grief. When they begin to collaborate on a knitting exhibition, they find comfort, friendship, and healing.

A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens — Madame Defarge is a knitter and main antagonist in this classic Dickens novel. She would famously sit beside the guillotine during executions, knitting the names of those destined for the chop.

The Knitting Circle by Ann Hood — A woman loses her child and ends up joining a knitting club where she meets people facing their own grief, trauma, and illness by mindfully making one stitch at a time.

The Friday Night Knitting club series by Kate Jacobs — This is a women’s fiction series focused on the women who attend a local knitting club. The series follows each of the women as they experience love, careers, motherhood, disease, graceful aging, and reinvention.

The Blossom Street series by Debbie Macomber — This ten-book series focuses on the women who attend Seattle’s Blossom Street knitting shop as they seek friendship, comfort, self-actualization, and romance.

Beach Street Knitting Society and Yarn Club series by Gil McNeil — Jo Mackenzie is a newly widowed and single mother of two boys who moves to the English seaside to take over her Gran’s knitting shop. Jo finds friendship, camaraderie, and plenty to gossip about with the local knitters club.

Romance Novels Featuring Knitters

Real Men Knit series by Kwana Jackson — A romance series focusing on the Strong brothers who have inherited a Harlem yarn and knitting shop from their mother. These four brothers break racial and gender stereotypes by keeping their mother’s memory and legacy alive through running her knitting shop. This is a relatively new series with only two books in it so far, but hopefully there is more to come.

Knitting in the City series by Penny Reid — This seven-book romance series follows a group of friends who have a weekly knitting club. The friends gossip and commiserate as each lady pursues her happily ever after.

Cozy and Paranormal Mysteries with Gumshoe Knitters

The Miss Marple series Agatha Christy – This series of crime novels and short stories features Miss Marple, an amateur consulting detective who has developed a keen understanding of human nature after having spent many hours knitting and people-watching.

Haunted Yarn Shop Mystery series by Molly MacRae — This six-book paranormal mystery series follows Kath, who inherits her grandmother’s yarn shop in Blue Plum, Tennessee. These stories feature ghosts and the paranormal.

Knitting Mysteries series by Maggie Sefton — This sixteen-book mystery series follows Kelly and the rest of the gang at the House of Lamb knitting club in Colorado as they solve mysteries large and small in their home town of Fort Connor.

The Vampire Knitting Club series by Nancy Warren — This fifteen-book paranormal mystery series features American-raised Lucy Swift who moves to Oxford England to take over her Gran’s knitting shop. Little does she know, but her basement is the home of a group of late-night knitting vampires who pass the centuries knitting sweaters and baby booties. Lucy soon discovers that Oxford is filled with paranormal activity, mystery, and murder.

In Conclusion

It has been an absolute delight to discover there are so many wonderful books about knitting and knitters. I’m sure there are hundreds of more books that feature knitting that I haven’t had the space to mention, but these are just the ones I was able to find through my local library. I could spend multiple years only reading books about knitters. How wonderful!

While I haven’t had a chance to read all of these yet, it has certainly been a wonderful surprise to discover how many other people enjoy knitting enough to write about it—and even build whole careers writing about it.

If you know an avid knitter, or if your local knitting club is thinking about sharing books, please consider sharing this list!

E. S. O. Martin is a novelist, short story writer, and avid knitter. She blogs about books and Slavic folklore at esomartin.com. Consider signing up for her email newsletter to receive a free story and receive monthly updates about her works in progress.

Beyond Dracula: Slavic Vampires

November 2, 2024Slavic Spirits (series)E.S.O. Martin

In the shadowy corners of Slavic folklore, the vampire emerges as a creature of horror and intrigue. Unlike the singular image popularized by Western media, Slavic legends describe many different types of vampiric beings, each with unique origins and characteristics. These tales, deeply rooted in cultural fears and the understanding of death and disease, offer a complex classification of vampires, ranging from patient zero of an epidemic, to the living cursed, to the undead horrors that stalk the night.

Among the different vampire beings, there seems to be approximately four classes:

The Born Vampire — This was someone born with some omen or defect. It was believed they might have the ability to become a vampire, or transform into an animal.
The Restless Dead Vampire — This was someone whose death was unnatural and who did not have the proper prayer or burial rights performed.
Humans Who Pray on Other Humans, Like Vampires – This person was either to be a demon, or to be possessed by a demon.
The Contagious Vampire — Patient zero of an epidemic.

Classes of Vampire

Strzyga — This being is born with two souls, one of which departs the body at death, but the other may return to animate the body and prey on the living. Strzyga were also believed to have the ability to transform into an owl.

Dhampir — Born of a human and a vampire, dhampirs are often considered natural vampire hunters, possessing abilities from both realms.

Strigoi — In some legends, this creature is the seventh child of the same sex in a family, inherently cursed to become a vampire.

Upiór — This type of vampire arises from the spirit of a deceased person who either died a violent or unnatural death, or who was not buried with the proper funeral rites. This restless vampire might rise from their grave to hunt the living, requiring blood to sustain its existence.

Bezkost — A gruisome vampire, this entity is a boneless sack of skin that emerges from graves to consume the living, capable of morphing into shadows or fogs.

Bitten by a Vampire — Similar to other vampire myths, being bitten and undergoing a transformative ritual could turn a person into a vampire.

Humans with Demonic or Vampiric Tendencies

Succubus and Incubus — Demonic entities that drain life through sexual contact, often consuming blood to intensify their power.

Witches and Sorcerers — Individuals involved in dark arts could transform into vampires, feeding on the blood of the living to enhance their magical powers.

The Nobility — Figures like Count Dracula, Vlad the Impaler, or Elizabeth Bathory, who bathed in virgin blood for beauty, are well-known. But there were other nobility throughout Eastern Europe who abused their power in large and small ways. Suspicion of the elite among the peasantry was a natural result of wars, feudalism, and inequality.

Real-Life Origins of the Vampire Myth

Decomposition — Misunderstandings of the body’s decomposition processes led to vampire legends, where bloating or blood at the mouth suggested an unnatural afterlife.

Premature Burial — Cases where individuals were buried alive by mistake contributed to tales of the undead crawling out of their graves.

Patient Zero — During epidemics, the first to die were often blamed for continuing to spread the disease posthumously, leading to classification as vampires. Villagers hoping to rid their town of disease might exhume this patient zero, cut off its head, and then rebury the body in hope of ridding their town of the “vampire.”

How to Vanquish a Vampire

Slavic folklore is rich with many specific methods to deal with vampires. Stories disagree on whether churches, holy relics, garlic, or mirrors have any influence on vampires. However, the following three methods seem to be the most “tried and true” among all regions of the Slavic world that believed in vampires.

Staking — A stake through the heart is the most classic method, believed to “deflate” or permanently immobilize the vampire. The type of wood didn’t matter: whatever wood was locally available.

Decapitation and Reburial Tactics — Removing the head or burying it separately was common, as was burying sharp objects with the body to prevent rising.

Cremation — Completely burning the body was often seen as the most effective way to stop a vampire from rising from the dead.

Conclusion

The vampire in Slavic lore is more than just a bloodthirsty monster; it is a manifestation of the human psyche grappling with the mysteries of death, disease, and the afterlife. From the strzyga to the upiór, these creatures symbolize the fear and fascination with the macabre, serving as cautionary tales against the dark corners of the world and the human soul. Understanding these legends offers a window into the values, fears, and spiritual beliefs of Slavic cultures, revealing a world where the boundaries between life and death are as thin as the veil between folklore and reality.

If you liked this blog post, please consider subscribing to my free Reader’s Club newsletter. Subscribers receive monthly updates on this Slavic Spirits series, as well as book reviews, and updates on my works in progress.

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UPDATE — This blog post includes text and images generated with the assistance of OpenAI’s models. I provided detailed prompts, curated the outputs, and made edits, but the majority of the content was created with AI assistance. This disclosure aligns with my commitment to transparency under the EU AI Act. Disclosure added on November 18, 2024 to align with transparency requirements under the EU AI Act.

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License. Portions of this content were generated using OpenAI’s models, with significant curation, editing, and creative input by E. S. O. Martin. AI-generated portions may not be subject to copyright under current laws.

Book Review: “The Familiar” by Leigh Bardugo

October 26, 2024ReviewsE.S.O. Martin

Leigh Bardugo’s novel “The Familiar” transports readers to the vibrant yet perilous backdrop of middle ages Spain, a setting deeply enmeshed in the turmoil of the Spanish Inquisition. This standalone historical fantasy introduces us to Luzia Cotado, a Jewish scullery maid whose hidden talent reveals a stirring blend of culture, magic, and danger.

Plot Overview:

Luzia, a humble maid, discovers that her unique blend of singing in Spanish and Hebrew can conjure magic. This extraordinary ability catches the eye of the lady of the house, who sees potential for Luzia’s gifts to enhance the household’s standing through enchanting performances. However, as Luzia’s abilities gain wider attention, they draw the interest of powerful and dangerous figures within Spain, thrusting her into a vortex of intrigue and peril.

The narrative also weaves a compelling romantic thread between Luzia and Guillén Santángel, a cursed immortal who is brought in to tutor her. Their relationship, marked by an exploration of love across the chasms of time and curse, adds depth to the historical and magical elements of the story.

Cultural and Historical Setting:

Bardugo masterfully paints the tense atmosphere of a Spain gripped by the Inquisition, where fear and suspicion loom large. The choice of Luzia as a Jewish protagonist in this era is particularly poignant, reflecting the fraught position of Jewish communities in historical Spain. This setting not only provides a rich historical tapestry but also raises timeless questions about tolerance, identity, and power.

Themes and Character Development:

“The Familiar” excels in its exploration of themes such as the power of art and the dangers of visibility, especially for those deemed other by mainstream society. Luzia’s journey from a maid shielded by anonymity to a magician exposed to the societal elite encapsulates the double-edged sword of possessing extraordinary talents in a world rife with bigotry and greed.

Luzia’s character development, coupled with the enchanting yet dangerous dynamics of her magic, portrays a narrative where personal growth intersects with cultural survival. The magic system—rooted in the authentic linguistic and cultural heritage of Luzia—enriches the fantasy elements with a sense of realism and reverence for the historical period.

Conclusion:

Leigh Bardugo’s “The Familiar” is a compelling addition to the genre of historical fantasy, offering a story that is as enchanting as it is thought-provoking. Through Luzia’s eyes, readers experience the visceral fears and dazzling wonders of a society on the brink of monumental change, underscored by the rich tapestry of Jewish and Spanish cultures.

For fans of historical fantasy that marries deep cultural insights with the thrill of magical realism, “The Familiar” is a must-read.

Join my free Reader’s Club newsletter for more reviews on young adult fantasy books and to receive updates on my Slavic Spirits series and other writing projects. Dive into narratives where the past and the magical forge stories that resonate with timeless themes and unforgettable characters.

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Slavic Dolls: Artistic Wards of Comfort and Protection

October 19, 2024Journal, Polish, Slavic Spirits (series)E.S.O. Martin

Among the Slavs, dolls were not merely children’s toys but also objects of art, mystery, and protection. They served both as cultural artifacts and mystical symbols in folklore and ritual.

From the faceless dolls that guarded against malevolent spirits to the effigies used in seasonal festivals, these dolls are a vibrant part of Slavic heritage. Here we will explore some of the most iconic types of Slavic dolls, and their significance in fairy tales and cultural practices.

Matryoshka Nesting Dolls: The Iconic Symbol of Russian Folk Art

The most famous and easily recognizable doll in Slavic culture are the Matryoshka nesting dolls. These intricately painted wooden dolls opened along the middle and came in complimentary sizes so that smaller dolls could be nested within.

The first set of Matryoshka dolls was created in the late 19th century by Vasily Zvyozdochkin, a craftsman from the Abramtsevo estate near Moscow, and painted by Sergei Malyutin, a folk artist. The concept was inspired by a set of Japanese nesting figures, and the idea quickly took root in Russian folk art. The name “Matryoshka” comes from the Russian female name “Matryona,” which was a common name among the rural population of Russia and is derived from the Latin root “mater,” meaning “mother.” This name is fitting as the dolls symbolically represent fertility and the maternal lineage passing down through generations.

Matryoshka dolls are more than just decorative items; they are steeped in symbolic meanings. Traditionally, the outer layer, the largest doll, is a woman dressed in a traditional Russian peasant dress. This figure represents the matriarch of the family, embodying strength, fertility, and the continuity of family heritage. The figures nestled inside can represent children or grandchildren, signifying family unity and the passing of traditions from one generation to the next.

In literature and media, Matryoshka dolls are sometimes used metaphorically to represent complex layers of personality or hidden truths within a story, illustrating their deep-rooted symbolism in popular culture.

The number of nested dolls can vary, typically ranging from three to more than a dozen. Each doll is painted by hand, often in bright colors adorned with floral patterns, and sometimes reflecting regional Russian costumes or historical attire. The artistry involved in painting each piece showcases the skill and creativity of Russian artisans, making each set unique.

The Marzanna Effigy

The Marzanna doll is a central figure in a springtime ritual that marks the end of winter’s chill and the rejuvenation of the earth. Made from straw and clothed in old rags, this effigy represents the Slavic goddess of winter, death, and rebirth. The ritual involves parading the Marzanna doll through the village and then drowning it in a river or burning it, symbolizing the defeat of winter and the ushering in of spring. This ritual highlights the cyclical nature of seasons and the concept of regeneration and renewal in Slavic culture.

The Faceless Doll

In Slavic tradition, the faceless doll holds a special place. These dolls, often made without distinct facial features, are rooted in ancient beliefs about the soul. The lack of a face is thought to prevent evil spirits from having a place to inhabit, thus protecting the home and its inhabitants. These dolls are typically handmade from natural materials like straw and fabric, embodying the spirit of simplicity and protection. They serve not only as toys but also as talismans, promoting peace and security within domestic spaces.

Motanka Dolls and Berehynia Dolls

Motanka dolls and Berehynia dolls are another enchanting aspect of Slavic doll-making tradition. These are thread-wrapped dolls, created by winding cloth around a cross-shaped base, typically without the use of needles or glue, which is believed to imbue them with spiritual power. Motankas and Berehynias often serve as charms for health and prosperity. Like faceless dolls, they sometimes lack distinct facial features to ward off evil spirits, and were instead embroidered with a instead of a face.

These dolls were sometimes placed throughout the household for protection, as a connection to a woman’s ancestors, and as playthings for her children. A mother might give her young child a Motanka or Berehynia Doll as a “wishing” doll. A special doll to keep under their pillow, to whom they could share their wishes and worries with.

Vasilisa the Beautiful’s Talking Doll

One of the most famous dolls in Slavic folklore appears in the tale of Vasilisa the Beautiful. This doll, a gift from Vasilisa’s dying mother, serves as her protector and guide. Unlike typical dolls, this one possesses the ability to talk and offers advice, helping Vasilisa navigate the challenges and dangers she faces, including her servitude to the fearsome witch, Baba Yaga. The talking doll symbolizes intuition and wisdom passed down through generations, illustrating the profound connection between family members, even beyond death.

Dolls: Symbols of Childhood, Motherhood, Womanhood, and Protection

These dolls, each unique in form and purpose, are more than just cultural artifacts. They are woven into the folklore, traditions, and daily lives of Slavic peoples. Whether used in rituals, as toys, or as household decorations, Slavic dolls are a vibrant expression of a rich cultural heritage, offering insight into the spiritual and artistic life of Slavic communities.

For those intrigued by Slavic history and folklore, consider subscribing to my Reader’s Club newsletter. Newsletter subscribers receive monthly updates on this Slavic Spirits blog series, as well as book reviews, and notes on my works in progress.

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Gift or Burden: The Truth Behind the Sweater Curse

October 12, 2024Journal, KnittingE.S.O. Martin

Knitters often joke about the “sweater curse”, which is when you knit a present for a significant other and then the relationship promptly ends. This dynamic can also play out between friends.

Imagine this scenario: you are someone with a very clear sense of what you like to wear: comfortable t-shirts, jeans, and your favorite hoodie. Then someone gives you a hand-knit sweater…

a) You don’t wear knitted clothes, and the knitter didn’t bother to notice. Even if they did notice, it seems they didn’t care because they are trying to change you from a fleece and hoodie-person into a turtleneck sweater-person.

b) The sweater doesn’t fit you. The itchy wool turtleneck feels like it’s strangling you. There are all these fussy cables that make you look fat. It sags at the armpits. It’s too short. The sleeves are too long.

c) The sweater is in a horrible color that doesn’t match any of the rest of your wardrobe. Has the knitter not even been looking at you?

d) The sweater is made from very expensive wool that has to be hand-washed with baby shampoo and dried flat in the sun. (Great! More chores!!!)

e) The knitter says they spent a thousand hours on it and they “knit love into every stitch.”

Oh my God, now you feel guilty AND suffocated. There is too much pressure and expectation in this relationship. It has to end!

Voila… The Sweater Curse has struck again!

The poor knitter has just wasted many hours of misdirected energy. They put more time into their knitting and fantasies of how the gift would be received, rather than getting to know the person who was the object of their affection.

The truth is that when a gift comes with a load of emotional baggage, it is no gift at all. It is a burden. Wanting to receive unending praise for such a “gift” is manipulative, passive-aggressive hostage-taking.

I have been on both the giving and receiving end of the sweater curse. I’ve received hand-knit presents that were too precious to use because the material was not appropriate for my lifestyle. I’ve also given presents to people that didn’t fit properly and then the present went unused, was donated, or thrown away.

A Lesson in Gift-Giving:

I once knitted my mother a beautiful wool sweater from this gorgeous olive-green yarn.

But it turned out the shoulders didn’t fit quite right. A few years later, she unraveled that sweater, used the wool to knit a shawl, and gave it back to me.

At first I felt incredibly hurt. She had unraveled and re-gifted me my own sweater?!

But then I had to laugh at myself. The fact that she unraveled my sweater to make a gift for me was a wonderful lesson in the impermanence of objects.

My mom said that with every stitch of yarn that went through her fingers, she felt like she was touching my hands, my love for her, and multiplying it by making something to give back to me. She hadn’t destroyed my gift. She’d doubled it by giving each of us a story of one ball of yarn, touched by two generations of women expressing our love for each other through handmade gifts. That’s actually pretty incredible!

My mother’s re-gifted hand-knit shawl. Best gift ever!

Now, when I look at this green wool shawl, I think about my mother and how grateful I am that she taught me that a person doesn’t have to be overly sentimental about objects. It’s the relationship that’s important; not the object.

Gifts don’t have to be overly sentimental or emotionally burdensome. A true gift means giving something with no strings attached (excuse the pun). The person receiving a gift should be free to unravel it, sell it, wear it, give it away… whatever best suits their needs.

At its best, knitting gifts is basically a loving-kindness meditation. You think about the person you are knitting for. With each stitch, you weave in love, compassion, and good wishes for health and peace.

I recently knit my son a sweater and I was astonished by how much he loves it. He wears it every chance he gets. It’s the right color, the right fit, and the right material for him. I involved him at every step of the decision-making process.

He loves this sweater so much that I knit him a second sweater so that he can rotate between the two of them.

“Maybe buying a sweater is cheaper,” my son said, “but this is so much better because it is made with love. And it can be made exactly the way I want it.”

When you get it right, a handmade gift can be the best thing in the world.

Five Tips to Avoid the Sweater Curse:

There is a world of difference between what is fun for the knitter to make and what the person receiving the gift might actually want to wear.

I’m overgeneralizing here, but most people seem to prefer wearing a simple, stockinette-stitch piece in one color, made from a non-fussy fabric that they can throw in the washing machine. For advanced knitters, this type of project can be a bit boring because it doesn’t show off any of our fancy skills. But when you want to avoid the Sweater Curse, it’s best to play it safe by sticking to something really simple.

Tip #1 — Involve the person (or a trusted ally) in the project. Ask if you can look through their closet to determine their favorite color scheme. Take measurements from their favorite sweater. Ask them what they want. Ask the person if they are allergic to dyes or materials: you don’t want to give a wool sweater to someone who is allergic to wool. As if they have ethical objections to animal-based fibers.

The surprise factor: I know there is a fantasy of giving a gift as a surprise. If you aren’t sure if you can execute the gift well, you can quietly give up without them being any the wiser. The pressure of creating a custom-made garment that either never arrives or is poorly constructed can ruin a relationship. (But then, if a relationship is ruined by a few dropped stitches, then perhaps it wasn’t on firm footing in the first place.)

Tip #2 — Choose smaller projects. Hats, scarves, cowls, fingerless mittens, cotton washcloths or dish cloths, kitchen towels, bath mats. These small projects can be completed in a weekend, and are relatively low stakes.

Tip #3 — Budget a reasonable amount of money and time on this gift. DO NOT spend 900 hours and hundreds of dollars on material. This is too much of a burden to put on the receiver of a gift. Use cheaper material, like cotton or polyester.

Tip #4 — Choose the right yarn. Consider your audience: what material will they appreciate? Is this the kind of person who will handwash their cashmere sweater? Is this a person who just needs to throw the object in the washing machine and dryer? Do they have pets? Children? Will the item get stained? Are they allergic to wool or synthetics? Are they vegan?

Tip #4 — Choose the right colors. Black, charcoal gray, and navy blue looks good on most people. But more importantly, what colors does this person usually wear? Do they like stripes? Do they like bright yellows and reds? If you don’t know this person well enough to know the colors they prefer, don’t knit them a sweater. If you want the item to be loved, choose something that’s similar to what you already know they love.

Tip #5 — Size and fit. The safest choice is to make something that doesn’t need body measurements. Dish cloths, shawls, blankets, pillows. The next best choice is to ask to borrow and measure one of their favorite items of clothing and use this as your model for whatever you make. If you don’t know this person well enough to ask them (or a trusted ally) for measurements of their favorite item of clothing, DON’T make them clothing as a gift.

I hope you’ve found these tips helpful! If you like what you’ve read, consider signing up for my newsletter. Newsletter subscribers will receive monthly-ish emails with updates on my writing works in progress, book reviews, and updates on my Slavic Spirits series, which is about Polish and Slavic folklore and mythology. Happy knitting and happy reading!

Book Review: The Grishaverse Series by Leigh Bardugo

October 5, 2024ReviewsE.S.O. Martin

The Rise of Tsarpunk

Leigh Bardugo’s Grishaverse is a breathtaking young adult fantasy series set in a richly-detailed world inspired by 19th-century Russia, often referred to as “tsarpunk.” The series spans ten books, including a trilogy, two duologies, and three collections of short stories and novellas, each weaving together a tapestry of magic, intrigue, and romance.

Series Overview:

The Grishaverse unfolds in a world where Grisha, individuals with the ability to manipulate matter at its most fundamental levels, are both revered and feared. From summoning fire to manipulating the human body, their powers shape the political and social landscape of Bardugo’s intricate world.

Shadow and Bone Trilogy:

– Shadow and Bone: An orphaned soldier discovers her devastating power that could be the key to saving her war-ravaged country.

– Siege and Storm: Dark secrets and new allies emerge as the battle for power grows more desperate.

– Ruin and Rising: The fate of the Grisha world culminates in a final, heart-wrenching showdown.

Six of Crows Duology:

– Six of Crows: A heist led by a cunning criminal mastermind tests the loyalty and courage of six outcasts.

– Crooked Kingdom: The crew faces the aftermath of their daring heist, navigating vengeance, survival, and the shifting tides of power.

King of Scars Duology:

– King of Scars: A young king must harness his fearsome power to protect his kingdom from a looming threat.

– Rule of Wolves: As enemies gather at his borders, the king must fight on multiple fronts to save his nation.

Companion Books/Short Story Collections:

– The Language of Thorns: A collection of six folklore-inspired stories set in the Grishaverse.

– The Lives of Saints: Deep dives into the tales of saints revered in the world of Grisha.

– Demon in the Wood: A graphic novel prequel focusing on the Darkling’s origin story.

Personal Take:

Leigh Bardugo’s ability to blend deep cultural roots with expansive world-building makes the Grishaverse series a standout. The integration of tsarpunk elements with complex character dynamics and high-stakes magical conflicts offers readers an immersive experience. The portrayal of characters like Alina in the trilogy and Kaz in the duology—each struggling with their identities and the burdens of their powers—provides a compelling look at leadership and morality.

What resonates most profoundly in these narratives is the seamless integration of the characters’ personal journeys with the larger political and magical conflicts. Particularly in Six of Crows, the diverse backgrounds and complex motivations of each character enrich the narrative, making their interactions and growth exceptionally engaging.

Bardugo’s treatment of cultural elements—seen in the characters’ reverence for their saints and the mystical aspects of their folklore—adds depth and authenticity, making the series not just a fantastical escape but also a reflection on the power of belief and heritage.

For fans of rich fantasy worlds and intricate plotting, Leigh Bardugo’s Grishaverse offers a spectacular blend of adventure, magic, and intrigue.

If you liked this review, consider subscribing to my free Reader’s Club newsletter for more young adult fantasy book reviews, updates on my Slavic Spirits series, and insights into my writing works in progress. Join now and discover a world where magic knows no bounds.

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